Will I still Compete in Pageants?

I never thought the day would come where I would say that. I LOVE pageants with all my heart. Competing in pageants changed the trajectory of my life in the best way possible. It created my wildest dreams and brought them to life. It humbled me and gave me a new level of self awareness. It pushed me to do anything I set my mind to, and so much more. But with the many changes that have occurred in this transitional phase of my life, I am wondering if I have the bandwidth to invest in pageants the way I did before.

Building out my own business has been a scary journey testing out my imposter syndrome. It’s not like my corporate job where there was a steady source of income I could feel comfortable with to spend money on activities like pageants. I’m so grateful I even have the luxury of competing in pageants for most of my life. There’s been so many changes that have also happened in the pageant space I do not know if I am as willing to put in the time and money I did to compete as I did before.

Part of me also wonders if I should focus on sponsoring pageants, or supporting in different roles outside of being a competitor. I would love to build websites for other pageant systems, but I think in an ideal world, what I would love to do most is talk to the other contestants and encourage them to get out of their comfort zone. Something like a National American Miss choreographer. I remember when I was the National American Miss Florida Jr. Teen I loved talking to the girls at rehearsals and giving them tips. Not to worry about messing up their personal introduction because no one else would know their introduction besides their parent potentially. And to be so proud of themselves for stepping out of their comfort zones. I remember so many girls and their moms thanked me for being a good role model.

Pageant people ask me what the next system I’ll compete in be, and I still don’t really know. While I’m so glad I could still compete in the Miss Universe Organization now with the age restriction lifted, I know right now the business owner part of me would feel so guilty investing so much into the pageant preparation when I should put that energy into my business. I want to find a way to make my entrepreneurial endeavors with Lashes and Sashes and Digit-Eli sustainable, but I know that will take more patience and consistency. However, I also know once I get to that point, I will be so much more appreciative of the next pageant I’ll be able to compete in.